August 17, 2005 "Jude Law has a small penis" The NY Post reports that pictures of Jude Law changing into a swimsuit outside his mother's house in France reveal that he has a small wiener. I'd say it more professionally, but I think small wiener really sums up everything you need to know. I haven't seen the pictures myself, but I'm just going to pretend that I have and say that his wiener was about 1.2" long. And I'm talking erect here, folks. Lord knows why he would have an erection after swimming outside his mother's home, but that's the story I've made up and I'm sticking to it. I don't want to imply that he has erotic feelings towards his own mother, but any man who cheats on his beautiful fiance with an ugly nanny isn't completely right in the head and probably has a small penis. Scratch that, definitely has a small penis. A 1.2" penis to be exact. *Update: Okay, so maybe 1.2" was slightly exaggerated. His penis does, however, look like a weird little monster. Some very NSFW pictures of the thing after the jump. Thanks to the wonderfully sexy Meredith for the images.